What is Italian for "Duh"?

By Kanrei

An Italian intends to rob an elderly woman. He waits patiently in the shadows, lurking and planning; waiting for just the right mark to come down the street. He soon sees a poor, helpless 77 year old woman walking alone. “This one is the one” he tells himself as she passes his perch.

He jumps and takes his prey by surprise. Reflexively, he grabs her bag vanishes into the night. Don is quite the thief. The poor woman never saw it coming and probably still is not sure what happened. He got the purse and got away without any snags. So why does he feel like he forgot something?

The man, let's call him "Don", soon realizes that his cell phone is not to be found. This is a common problem we have all faced at some point in our lives. It is one of the annoyances of the tech-age. It is not really anything to get stressed over; just call your phone and follow the rings. This is exactly what Don did, only he did not hear rings, he heard “Hello?”

Someone had found Don’s phone. This was particularly good news for Don and he made arrangements to meet his hero and retrieve his phone. This took one stress off his mind and allowed him to quickly rob another woman of her purse and scooter on his way to the meeting.

Yesterday I spoke about G-d’s sense of humor- here it is again.

What Don did not know is that he dropped his phone during the robbery of the 77 year old pigeon. She had found it and turned it over to the police. When he called to claim his phone, he was confessing to the crime. When he made arrangements to pick up his phone, he was turning himself in. The new stolen purse and scooter were just bonus prizes to the cops.

Don was released from prison just a short time before this wonderful exchange due to overcrowding in Italian prisons. You just cannot make this stuff up. I wonder if he will get the same cell.