I can see it on the horizon. I have less than 24 hours now at this point. At 11:40-ish AM tomorrow I start my 40th year in this reality. Funny and I know it is a cliché, but I don't feel 40. Or maybe I do feel 40 and, having never been 40 before just don't recognize it as such. Maybe THIS is how 40 feels; exactly like 30. It is rather weird the weight we assign to arbitrary numbers and how we define ourselves based on how society thinks that number should behave.
"He doesn't act 40."
If it wasn't for the mirror, I would say I was turning 25. I feel the same as I did. The parts of me I can see without a mirror look basically the same; hands, feet, legs, etc. I do have a bald spot, but at my height, who can see it? Even my thoughts are the same as when I was 25. First on my mind right now are the amazing records I found yesterday after work and I can't wait to get home and listen to them some more; just like when I was 25. I am even playing video games nightly; just like 25.
So, how does 40 act? When I was a kid, I thought 40 was when you started sizing dentures. I thought it was the age Depends became underwear and "sir" became a polite way of saying "asshole" as in "excuse me, but you are in the way, sir" or "no sir, you must wait over there." I was preparing for my first Social Security check and AARP application. I was thinking of burial plots. These may have been an incorrect assumptions on my part.
Tomorrow I am having a Carvel Ice Cream Cake for my 40th and my brother, sister, sister-in-law, and niece are going to spend it with me and my parents. I can't wait.
Oh, and when tomorrow does come, wish my mother a happy birthday instead of me. I was a C-section baby delivered a month late so I literally didn't do a damn thing on that day. Yes, I was lazy even in utero .
Happy Giving Birth Day Mom
No comments:
Post a Comment