Thursday, June 05, 2008

...I Have To Wear Shades

The Week from Hell continues, but is getting less and less Hellish every day. Where I had to convince myself earlier this week that all was not lost, today I actually believe it in my soul. It could be the minor rapture I experienced the other night while praying (yes, I do pray, but my relationship with G-d is between me and G-d so I don’t talk about it much), or it could be the vibe I got from the meeting today with all of our techs, but I feel confident right now that all is going to be better than OK, it will be better than it ever has been.

OK, rapture. I prayed the other night because of all that is happening right now in my life. I worry about my parents because they are not cynics and are not as prepared for betrayal as I am. I worried about my co-workers and if they believe us when we reassure them all will be OK, or if they think it is just empty spin. I worried that, if they do have faith in us that we might let them down. I worried that, if they didn’t and went to the other company, that the other company would let them down. I worried that the person who betrayed me and my family so deeply was not the evil person, but rather just a fool who trusted the wrong person and now their family will be screwed as a result. Yes, I worried about the futures of those that betray me. I am a nice guy when push comes to shove, so I prayed to G-d to guide all of these things to the outcome that is best for all. I did not ask for a specific outcome, because who am I to pray for anything specific in anyone else’s life. I just asked G-d to guide all concerned to the best outcome for all concerned.

I finish my prayer and begin to feel chills. My face contorts to a smile and I begin laughing while tears fall down my face. The hairs on my neck stand up and I feel that everything is going to be fine. I am not some religious freak, so I don’t mind you disbelieving me or thinking it was something else. I would be doing the same if I read that on your blog, but I believe it to be true. It was as if G-d were reassuring me that all is as it should be and that is good. I slept for the first time in days.

Today was the rally meeting with the techs. We gathered those who have generally worked at our location and told them they have to decide which facility they want to work at. We told them our plans and what we wanted from them. When asked about the other place, we were honest and said that we had no idea what was going to be. It might be more money, might be less. It could be more work, could be less. We could not say. At the end, I think a good percent is going to stay with us and that makes me very happy. I did just wreck my car though seeing one of them at the other place and wondering what they were doing there. Probably reporting to the enemy what happened during the meeting, but they have nothing to report. As the Grateful Dead once sang: We Will Survive!

Tomorrow will be a return to regular blogging, both here and at your sights. I have a lot of reading to do and will be commenting on more than just your most recent post, I promise. My political essay fell by the wayside this week due to the excitement, but it is not lost or forgotten.

Life can be a wild ride sometimes.


VE said...

Sounds like you're moving on from this crisis...

Serena Joy said...

I'm glad you're over the initial shock and are starting to see your way clear to moving forward.

Kanrei said...

Getting on slowly. Two people lost their jobs today because of all that has happened. I believe that is going to be all, but it still is very sad. Amazing how deep betrayal can dig it's roots.