It's Tuesday (The Vacation "It's Friday")

Time for yet another edition of “It’s Friday.” I know what you are about to say and you are correct, it is only Tuesday, but I am officially on a vacation until next Tuesday so today is an honorary Friday (in a good way).

Today was easier than most Fridays are, but it also lasted soooooooooooo damn long. I only had to schedule for one day as opposed to three as well, but then there was the stress…

I am not a person who takes vacations normally. I may take a day off here and there, but extended vacations are usually something I never bother with. There is something about leaving work for a week that makes it harder to come back. I tend to need a week off after my week off just to prepare to return, but this time is different. This time I need to leave my office for a week just to shake out all the stress.

The stress I am under is largely of my own creation to be honest, but it still remains a fact that stress and I are not the best of bedfellows. I am one of those “one thing at a time” people. Once I get a second task I tend to start to fray. Normally I have more than one boss so things get spread out nicely and evenly. I will get the chance to finish one thing before starting the next one. The last two weeks did not work out that way and I snapped.

See, my main boss was on vacation for two weeks and my other boss was in meetings and such so I was left on my own to deal with quite a bit. You have followed this blog so you know the stress pattern I have been under. See the last two “It’s Fridays” and the MIA IT story for more details. It built and built upon me and I snapped.

From the stories I am hearing I did a bit more than snap, but most of them are exaggerated for dramatic effect. I would say 75% are based on truth and 100% of them end up as works of fiction. The other 25% are flat out lies.

The big one is this: yes I kicked a door on my way out of the office. It was a left over trait from the restaurant business and I do regret that, but it was only done once, not “repeatedly.” I realize though that office people are probably not used to such behavior. I never yelled or screamed in front of anyone, but rather went outside for a cigarette when I needed to do those things. I did not threaten to fire anyone, but rather spoke about how great it would feel to do it and I never mentioned names. I do not have the authority to fire anyone at work.

I tend to talk about things I would love to do to help unload some stress. It reminds me that I am never trapped and always have options. I mean I quit my job about twenty times a year on average. Sometimes, to paraphrase the classic show “News Radio”, I come in on my weekends to quit a few times without anyone getting in the way. I also have employers who understand my shortcomings and are always there to talk to me about it when this starts happening.

I reach a critical stress level once every two years. I never see it coming and usually cannot see it while it is happening, but I recognize it when described to me. When my boss says “Brad we have to talk” I know exactly what is coming. I am blessed with great audio memory so I can always recap honestly the situation that caused the freak-out, but I never justify it. I should never show it and I do. I should probably have been fired a while ago, but as I said I have very understanding employers and co-workers.

So now I am on my week off to shuffle my deck and put the bad cards on the bottom. I plan on cleaning out my head, my heart, and my home this week. It will not be a restful week so much as just a necessary week. I will not abandon my Lemming House this week though so do not fear that. I cannot afford any squatters moving in. Thank G-d the week is over.